you

you
a tall container of emotional idiosyncrasies that no one would ever see unless they
talk to you
necessary to invite you to spew out your mental insecurities and reveal deepest secrets
excreting what exactly makes you
you
making sense of all that you choose to do
and why you smile at sad things

from these lenses of affection they are a changing shade of colour every time you tell me something
new
that exposes a novel part of your soul to me
making the solid colours swirl like the palettes of the galaxy
shining and twinkling in some parts
and pitch dark black in others

i feel like i have this
very prized telescope
being able to look into you
like this
that you have so hesitantly given me because you are afraid that
whoever knows your preferred method of taking tea
will also be able to hurt you

that whoever knows of your childhood fears and current guilts
will use this knowledge
to bring you harm

that whoever has such a peculiar interest in you
may be malicious indefinitely,
taking these precious details about you
to ridicule and reduce to stupid habits
most likely due to the fact that someone has harmed your heart
before

i have come to learn that those who i have loved
and who have hurt me
have never done so intentionally
and all had happened due to miscommunication
and a refusal to admit
and answer questions
that had difficult replies

talking honestly makes everything better
at least,
i believe
most of the time.

so while you hold yourself so rigid and afraid to open yourself up
horrified to see some spillage of some undesirable aspect
you should know that people are hardly ever judging you.
and if they are, that is more a reflection of themselves than you
since people are more prone to be ruthless to themselves rather than others
and that you deserve to be cherished and valued
than to be apprehensive of someone who wants to gift you nothing but
love and kindness
even if you cannot detect or refuse to admit it –

you
a lovely human who has so much to say
and so much to do
unable to access the courage to loosen up the grips of protective latches
or to be vulnerable and confident and strong on the surface
like how you say i am whenever i emerge.

i am these things because i draw strength from your quiet bravery
i am overtly terrified and shielded and overwhelmed
i am only able to admit this because i want you to listen and understand
that i understand
even if you don’t want to talk about it.

and that you are beautiful regardless.
and that you are loved by a lot of people.

you

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you are a reflection of everything i am not
you are the culmination for everything i have sought
you are the reason my own self i have fought
you are the spectre that haunts all my thoughts

you are the progress for which i have made
you are the power pumping blood in my veins
you are the loathing i express in my pain
you are the dreams i have spitefully slain

you are the mockingbird who sings me sweet lullabies
you are the image that keeps me up at night
you are photosynthesis culminated from light
you are the determinant of my courage and might

you are you are you are
you are a lot of things
you are you are you are
you are everything
yet i assign you to several entities
you are completely ridiculous
you are absurdly amazing

you give and you clip my two wings as i sing
the songs of my worries and wants,
just one thing,
i want you to want all the reasons you bring me

you are my universe
i just want you to want me