Thoughts from a Meal Deal

While I sit in my flat
Eating a sandwich I bought-
Falafel and hummus,
A meal deal from Tesco
With a fizzy drink
And a chocolate bar
Savouring an unsatisfying completeness
of a set of food items

I think about all the homeless people I’ve crossed
Who beg on the street for scraps and spare change
Turning grateful that I was born into a stage of life
Where this is where mediocrity has been established.

I’ve only had to work in places
Where my lack of experience and quirky appearance
Don’t subtract from my worth or value –
These aren’t tasks that are too hard to do,
So they find anyone that is “decent” enough to…

I think about all those people who need jobs
Where would-be tattoos and piercings are exchanged for a suit and tie
Turning grateful for what I do not have to submit
To the same kind of employment (just yet).

While I hear of stories of financial struggle
That are worse off than that of my own private affairs
There is a desperate longing to gift my excess
So that these situations may have more of a prerequisite…

Still never compromising their beliefs
Tirelessly straining with effort and strength
Worrying about these extra components
That I take for granted every day

I live with this guilt everyday
Wishing people would accept a donation on my part
For I was born into a life that is not
Prefixed with such hardship and manual exhaustion.

Youth of my age who cannot simply gift their loved ones
Presents to show their gratitude
For they themselves are unable to show
Such luxury for their own indulgence either.

I could be eating a meal deal from Marks and Spencer
And it would have the same impact
But the difference between that and some shitty Tesco packet
Is actually monumental for some.

There are so many movements to dedicate yourself to
Yet the ones I choose tend to be personal
Yet friends and lovers refuse to accept it
No matter how much you might want to give

It breaks my heart to hear their desires
Unrealised for lack of funds
Especially since they deserve to treat themselves
Or those that have helped them along the way

I live with this guilt everyday
(Snacking on almost mediocrity)
Probing ways to really change
The stagnant state of things

Making up for it in kind gestures
Or writing for external awareness.
It is a result of the constant lecture
Inside my head
That lights a fire
And leads a thought train
Tries to keep in mind
I must never forget
My privilege.


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